your psychologist experiences

[Kevin Hodge]

i've got the matrix on in the other room, so i'll keep it brief.

i'm pretty much deffo going to be going to see a psychologist fairly soon. the subject matter is really mental and i'm very scared about it, but i think i'll cope ok AS LONG AS I CAN DETERMINE THE PACE.

i just wondered what people's experiences of this sort of thing are. if i just explain that going too fast will likely make me not want to be alive anymore, d'you think they'll get the hint, or will they say i'm "not trying" and force me to send them poison pen letters and mutilate their cat/face/husband/porn collection?

i know i'll only get locked away for doing that, but i think in pricipal i'd be right.


i also thought of things like...saying to them 'ok, where i am now, i feel really confused. i want to stop coming to see you for x moths and then start the appointments again, because i need time to think and calm down'. anyone ever done that? does it sound ludicrous? that IS how i have been managing my brain, and i'm kind of kicking ass thangoovermuch.

meh. discuss.

am away to get my bondage gear on and hang oot with keanu

[Concept]

The first session will be to determine the problems you have rather than choose a course of action. It'll be a brief discussion on what you think your problems are and where you believe they stem from.

The important thing is to not let your nerves get the better of you and clam up completely, because what good will it do? It's not an interrogation. Just take things at a pace you feel comfortable with.

I say this because I saw one recently myself for another refferal, and I was doing my usual thing of looking at events through several periscopes for the duration of the appointment... not really focusing on the matter at hand and letting my somewhat sneery attitude get the better of me.

It sounds as though you're already proportioning blame inwardly because you're wary about applying yourself to methods you may not entirely have confidence in (if that's not the case, apologies for the presumption).

It's a natural trait to have when you're unconfident and unsure of yourself - fixing blame establishes solid ground for guilt to determine why things are going wrong in face of a worst case scenario, even if it's unwarranted or blown out of proportion. Just go and see what happens - I'm sure it won't be as bad as you expect and in all probability will lead to further help for yourself.

I don't know if you can cancel appointments and see psychologists at a time of your choosing if you're using the NHS. Probably not during the initial few weeks, but would it really do you any good to let things fester? It's a positive step you're taking - be satisified that you're attempting to get some help and stop beating yourself up for things that haven't happened yet.

[marbles]

Like what he said. But shorter. And not as good.

[Kevin Hodge]

Originally Posted by Concept

The first session will be to determine the problems you have rather than choose a course of action. It'll be a brief discussion on what you think your problems are and where you believe they stem from.

doesn't sound too bad

The important thing is to not let your nerves get the better of you and clam up completely, because what good will it do? It's not an interrogation. Just take things at a pace you feel comfortable with.

yeah, i've got to that stage with my sa, where i realise that i have to give a decent account of myself for it to be any use. all very true.

I say this because I saw one recently myself for another refferal, and I was doing my usual thing of looking at events through several periscopes for the duration of the appointment... not really focusing on the matter at hand and letting my somewhat sneery attitude get the better of me.

to bypass my 'survival instincts', i have taken a notepad with headings into these sorts of things, and even thought about/written down how i am going to explain myself etc, to save me comnig off as a bumface :embarass:

It sounds as though you're already proportioning blame inwardly because you're wary about applying yourself to methods you may not entirely have confidence in (if that's not the case, apologies for the presumption).

well, i'm certainly worried about their methods, definitely. without wanting to sound like an over-inflated nut-sack ( ), i think i am very good at sorting my head out, and i would always take the attitude that i know better than anyone else about how to make me feel better. sort of problematic that, if i intend to see a psychonometricist.

i don't know what you mean about blame though.

It's a natural trait to have when you're unconfident and unsure of yourself - fixing blame establishes solid ground for guilt to determine why things are going wrong in face of a worst case scenario, even if it's unwarranted or blown out of proportion. Just go and see what happens - I'm sure it won't be as bad as you expect and in all probability will lead to further help for yourself.

in typical fashion, i'm not sure i want to go now

over the past day or two, i have starting having some insights into ways that i can work on this by myself. to 99% of people that must sound like a cop-out, but it's really the truth that it is very complicated to explain what is wrong with me to someone else, so that they can then try to figure out how to help me. i already know tonnes about what is wrong and am good at applying solutions. so i dunno.

I don't know if you can cancel appointments and see psychologists at a time of your choosing if you're using the NHS. Probably not during the initial few weeks, but would it really do you any good to let things fester?

it's not really a case of festering. once i decide to go to work on something, i'm really full-on...i tend to mull it over all the time. it's just that, with things that cause me a lot of pain, it sometimes takes me time for my fear to die down enough so i can think about it properly. if i kept showing up for appointments when i was unable to move on, i'd be like 'yeah, so i've been thinking it all through, and i don't know how i feel. just like for the past two months. then last night i had this dream and it made me feel all weird and i don't know what's going on at all now'

It's a positive step you're taking - be satisified that you're attempting to get some help and stop beating yourself up for things that haven't happened yet.

i would adapt that slightly...i'm starting to take this new stuff on board and am going to start working on it. so i ought to say "I HAVE THE POWER!"

so...i haven't made my mind up about any of this yet, i'm still "analysing teh data" and shit. it'll likely go back and forth for a while.

cheers for the replies.

noone else got any impression of their psychologist that they could tell me? and i don't mean immitating their accent and nervous tics

[Kevin Hodge]

thanks hannah...can i just start by saying that your name is probably the best one? ever!?

um...avoiding going to see them...hmm.

i started off thinking that i would have to go because i didn't know what to do. and now i feel as if i do know quite a lot that i can do.

there is a lot about going to a psychologist that would traumatise me. losing control in front of a person, and the feeling of exposure, and having someone else set me psychological tasks terrifies me...things are so volatile in my head that it would be EXTREMELY DIFFICULT to have somebody observe how i react to dealing with...basically the worst stuff i have in my head :embarass: and they would be prodding around while i felt liked a cornered animal...at my most tactful i would find myself screaming 'JUST BACK OFF, I CAN'T BEAR THIS!'...

i think anyone should be able to see that these feelings tied up with seeing a Psych would be a big hindrance for me - a hindrance that is not present if i can fix things myself. there are definitely negatives about seeing a psych, for me at least. as i said, i am definitely very good at working on my thoughts and stuff, i know that. so there are definite advantages to not seeing them.

i'm not sure about your observations of them being empathic etc. i have heard plenty of anecdotes on here of crappy psychologists, and then there is the fact that a lot of people on here are far more empathic than a psych, for the simple reason that psychs have often never been mental ill i also have personal experience through people i know (in real life) of the difficulties of dealing with mental health professionals, and it can be kind of fraught.

the only risk for me in not seeing them would be that i wasn't prepared to deal with my issues. but that's not the case, when i take something on i really go for it, and there's more risk of me going at it TOO HARD that not dealing with it.

but the process they follow, which you describe, does sound helpful and supportive. you certainly seem to have had a good experience of these things, and it helps to know that. i'll bear your account in mind in my ruminations

[hardy]

You can control the pace. so thats no problem.
Some therapists wont like it if you say you want to stop coming for a while to recover. However I think many will accept it.